I LIKE CLOWNS.

WHEN I WAS A KID I USED TO SEE THE CLOWNS GOOFING AROUND IN THE CIRCUS. THEY HAD NO MONEY, AND THEY WERE REALLY DIRTY. THE CLOWNS SMELLED BAD, AND WOULD TEACH US KIDS CARD TRICKS AND SOMETIMES THEY’D LET US GO WITH THEM TO PICK UP ROTTED VEGETABLES IN THE MARKET TO MAKE SOUP.

I TRULY BELIEVE THAT CLOWNS ARE DEMONIC. THEY ARE DEMONS THAT PROTECT LITTLE CHILDREN.
JUST LOOK AT
JERRY LEWIS. HE WAS A CLOWN WHO WORE NO MAKEUP AND HIS KIDS LOVED HIM.
CLOWNS ARE EXTRAORDINARY. THEY DO GOOFY, MAGICAL THINGS AND THERE ARE MANY SPECIAL TECHNIQUES THAT CLOWNS USE IN THEIR ACTS, WHICH ARE TOP SECRET AND ONLY KNOWN TO THEM. CLOWNS ARE LIKE GARGOYLES. THEY ARE SO GOOD BECAUSE THEY LOOK POSITIVELY EVIL.

CLOWNS HAVE LARGE AMOUNTS OF GOOD LUCK. SO MUCH SO IN FACT THAT IF SOMEONE LAYS A CURSE ON A CLOWN, THE CURSE WILL COME OUT BACKWARD AND WILL TURN INTO A BLESSING INSTEAD.

SOME BAD CLOWNS:

PENNYWISE, THE CLOWN FROM “IT”
JOHN WAYNE GAYCE, A.K.A POGO THE CLOWN
INSANE CLOWN POSSE
KOKO THE CLOWN
HOMEY D CLOWN (OKAY, HE’S ACTUALLY GREAT)
SHAKES THE CLOWN (ALSO GREAT)

MAYBE THIS IS WHY PEOPLE SUFFER FROM COULROPHOBIA, WHICH IS THE FEAR OF CLOWNS. SUFFERERS OF THIS CONDITION COMPLAIN OF TERRIBLE ANXIETY ATTACKS TRIGGERED BY THE SIGHT OF THE HEAVY MAKEUP, BULBOUS NOSE, GIANT SHOES AND STRIDENT COLORED HAIR OF CLOWNS.

I KNEW A GIRL WHO WAS A HUGE ELVIS PRESLEY FAN, AND WAS AFRAID TO DEATH OF BALLOONS, WHICH IS ALMOST AS SAD AS BEING AFRAID OF CLOWNS.

I LOVE PAINTINGS OF CLOWNS. MY MOTHER HAD TWO BEAUTIFUL CLOWN PAINTINGS IN MY ROOM WHEN I WAS A KID, AND TO THIS DAY I AM AN AVID COLLECTOR OF CLOWN PAINTINGS.